Released Deid Bastards - the movie (well, video)

I'm having such a ball writing about the zombie hordes descending on Glasgow and how it efects a ragtag of survivors.

There's Glasgow couple Scott and Emma who might be expecting a baby. Well, it's hardly likely to be a puppy.

Would you like to be up the duff with the undead on the run?

Would be suicide bomber Doyle, who picks the 'wrang day for it.'
Geek Kenny who owns the last video store in Glasgow and perhaps the world.

Mustafa, a patriotic Scottish Asian muscle man who has a tendancy to act first and think later.
The characters are so real to me that I can see what they look like in my head. I even have an all Scottish cast lined up for the roles.

I thought you might like a peak at the video my clever partner, John made for me.

So far, I've sent the book to three publishers and one agent. Wish me luck, because the Deid Bastards deserve to be coming to a town near you.

I'm now off to buy the domain and make the t-hirts.

Respect the Genre

This picture will not make you transform into a werewolf

One of my favourite TV shows, Being Human about a werewolf, vampire and ghost living together has left me feeling disappointed this series.

Why? Because they haven't respected the genre.

Episode one of the new series, a werewolf uses a picture of a moon and not a full moon to transform. Werewolves need the real thing to transform.

Last episode of the season, a vampire gets into a house without being invited. Sure he burns but he still gets into the house thus breaking another genre rule. You need to invite a vampire in.

Despite the good writing and acting, these episodes left me deflated. Why? Because as a fan of the genre I hate it when they mess with them.  When they break the rules.

Sure they can be innovative – think True Blood that’s turned the vampire genre on its head. Be thought provoking. Do things that have never been done before. But never blatantly break the rules.

Not just in TV writing, but in novel writing too. Because if you don’t like it when writers of TV shows break the rules, chances are readers of your work won’t like it if you do the same.

What does a writer do all day?

As a full time writer you would think I'd have plenty of time to, well write. If only that were the case. Here's how I spent yesterday -

Got up and had some breakfast. Too busy booting up my laptop and doing 'dog tummy' so toast burned and turned to charcoal. Had to make more.

He wants dog tummy (his tummy rubbed)

Had to go round my blogs and social networks changing publication date for my book Living Cruelty Free. Publisher thought it was on sale now from Amazon but it won't be on sale until April 5th. 
Publisher tells me it will now be on sale on March 29th. Go round social networks and blogs changing it, again. Have a minute to myself to scream. Boyfriend tells me to stop swearing. I tell him to f off.

Spend ten minutes agonising over why agent from agency who say they always send an acknowledgement for all submissions hasn't sent me one three days after I sent submission package.
Spent ten minutes agonising over publisher I signed up with a year ago not being in touch for months despite me sending change of address and follow up to as unpublished book.

Tell nuisance caller to stop phoning me. It's a cold sales call and they've been phoning every day, sometimes several times a day. Then worry I was mistaken and it was a publisher and I've blown it.
Have a look to see if other publisher is still giving 2 of my books away free, which means I get no royalties. They didn't even tell me they were doing this. Yep, they still are.

Post copies of Living Cruelty Free to friends who've kindly agreed to review it.

Too busy working to see to dinner and it's ruined. Boyfriend and I have words. One word is said more than others. It begins with f.

Updated my author page on Goodreads and posted a review of new James Thompson book. To write well, you need to read well.

More dog tummy - it helps with the stress.

Reply to comments on various blogs - I have 4.

Post things that dogs should never eat on much neglected Caring for your dog blog. Have to break off to chase my rescue dog Benjy around the room with his bone.

Have a lengthy discussion with my brother about the origins of zombies. All research for my zombie book, Deid Bastards. We talk about stuff like this often. We are weird.

Add Amazon book carousel to my website and blogs. Takes me ages to realise I need to copy code into html of website.

Make video for Amazon as instructed by publisher. Well, boyfriend does as I tweet.

Put Facebook badges for my pages on all my blogs.

Follow back and DM people on Twitter. 

Change header on cruelty free blog to reflect new publication date. Also change links.

Gather financial data for my accounts. Fret over how to pay bills.

It's 4am and I haven't written so much as a sentence of my book all day. Oh well, at least I wrote this blog post.