submitting to publishers and agents is tougher than writing the actual book

 

So you think you've done all the hard work? - submitting to publishers and agents is tougher than writing the actual book.

I know this is not what you want to hear. It's not what I want to write either. You've worked tirelessly to get a finished manuscript. Honed it as best as you can. Edited and edited it to perfection. 

Now you are ready to send your baby off into the world. 

This should be the easy part, right? This is where I have to be totally honest with you. I find submitting the book to publishers and agents is much tougher than writing the book itself and it can take just as long if not longer.

The reason? The different guidelines that agents and publishers have for submissions.

And when I say different guidelines the very between individual publishers and agents and noticed agents and publishers.

Take the latest book I am submitting to agents and publishers (yes, some do accept manuscripts directly from authors). One publisher, I'm submitting to wanted 5000 words that best show your author's voice. And they don't necessarily have to be the first 5000 words of your book. 

This is an unusual request because submissions usually involve sending your first 3 chapters or 5000-10000 words or similar.

At the moment, I have 7 different publishers and agents on my top list and they all have very different submission guidelines which means some submissions can take a day or even days to prepare. 

What is a synopsis?

The synopsis is a case in point. There seems to be a difference of opinion in what exactly a synopsis is and what it should contain. To some, it's a rundown down of the story, whereas to others, it's more of a pitch for your book mentioning how you think it will stand out who will beat it and what competing books are. 

It's differences in what you have to submit and what interpretations are of what that material should contain that make submitting your novel so difficult.

If like me you are at that stage the best of luck to you. You have entered one of the most frustrating aspects of being a writer - the crazy world of what a proposal should contain.

Please let me know how you get on.

Emergency lockdown pandemic dental kit and DIY dentistry

 

It seems I'm not alone in having problems with my teeth during lockdown. Following my post about a chipped tooth, a few people have asked me how I did the temporary filling and got it to stay in. 

Here's how I did it (after many tries which made me realise dentists do really earn their money) - 

Please be warned, this information is not aimed at replacing your dentist. It's for you if one of your fillings has fallen out and you need a temporary filling until you can visit a dentist which is virtually impossible for many people right now.  

Get yourself an emergency dental kit. The best one I have found to be the best is Dentek and I bought it from Amazon. 

The white material you use to replace a filling (the pic shows just a small piece) comes inside a very small plastic jar think dolls house size. Follow the instructions on the packet. 

Tip - it's easy to over-estimate the amount of dental filling material you need. Aim for as small amount as you can get to replace the filling

When I applied the white filling material one of the first times, I used too much of the filling material and the end result was it caused a protruding bit on the tooth and hurt my mouth. The filling fell out and took part of my tooth with it. Ouch.

Tip - before you put the filling material in the tooth, brush your teeth and use a medicated mouthwash if possible. You want to avoid getting an infection.

If you do get an infection, your dentist may be able to prescribe antibiotics for you over the phone.

Tip - whatever you do, always make sure the filling material is in an airtight container to make sure it can be used again and doesn't dry out. I put the white filling material in the plastic jar that comes with the product and then inside a glass jar I got some herbal medicine in.

Tip - you will need a mirror. One of those small mirrors on a stick is ideal that you get in dental kits, so you can see see you have put the dental putty in correctly.

Good luck😊

      .

Going to the dentist during the pandemic Covid-19

The other night I was sitting having a cup of tea and reading through my latest work in progress when I felt the front of one my teeth break off. 

In a total panic I managed to scoop up the bit of tooth before my dog ate it and put it in a tooth saving jar that had come with a temporary filling kit. 

I had some crazy idea that the dentist would be able to glue the front of my tooth back in. Oh, how he laughed when I said that.

I spent a whole night in terror of the thought of having to 1, visit a dentist, or, 2, being unable to visit a dentist because of the pandemic. 

As terrified as I am of the dentist I don't want to be left in agonizing pain. 

I have a phobia about going to the dentist. The very thought of going fills me with utter terror. When I get there - and that's after I've tried to avoid going by using every trick in the book such as "this isn't really toothache I've got, it's just pain caused by TMJ" and "everytime I go to the dentist my teeth just get worse"- I always look for escape points. 

Yes, I may be that crazy woman you saw running screaming out of the dentist that time with my long hair trailing behind me because I'm running that fast.

Tip - phone the dentist as early as you can. They have very limited appointments because they have to leave a set amount of time between patients.

I got up the next morning and started calling my dentist as soon as it opened not knowing what to expect. 

It took a long time to get through to them and I thought that they might actually be closed and just have an answer machine on. Eventually I did get to speak to someone.

For those of you who need to go to the dentist urgently and don't know what to expect as I did, here is what happened to me. 

Note - I live in Scotland and it might vary because of where you live but the principles will probably the same - 

1. WHEN YOU GET THROUGH YOU WILL BE TRIAGED - most dentists are only seeing emergency patients. They need to make sure it genuinely is an emergency. 

What constitutes an emergency?

When I did my research, I was told that a broken tooth, chipped tooth, abscess in a tooth, pain and uncontrollable bleeding in the mouth are all considered emergencies especially when they are accompanied by extreme pain.

Because I had a chipped tooth I qualified.

Note - you will only be offered an appointment after you have been taking through a series of questions to ensure you do not have covid-19. If you do you will be referred to hospital for treatment.

2. YOU WILL NOT BE ALLOWED TO TAKE ANYONE WITH YOU TO THE APPOINTMENT

Whenever I go to the dentist, my mum goes with me as if I'm child which I pretty much am when I hit the dentist chair. Because of the chance of infection I wasn't allowed to take anyone with me. 

3. YOU MUST ARRIVE WEARING A MASK 😷😷😷😷. IF YOU DON'T YOU WILL BE TURNED AWAY.

I know that might sound crazy as you will have to remove the mask at one point but when you do take off your mask the dentist will be wearing a face mask or visor to limit the risk of infection.

4. YOU MUST COME TO THE APPOINTMENT DEAD ON TIME. 

This means you can't be early or late. This is because appointments are scrupulously timed so that there is exactly one hour between them so that the room can can be properly ventilated with windows open before a new patient. The examination room also has to be washed and disinfected in between patients. 

These measures are meant to stop the spread of covid-19. 

5. WHEN YOU ARRIVE AT THE PRACTICE YOU WILL BE ASKED THE EXACT SAME QUESTIONS AGAIN TO MAKE SURE YOU DO NOT HAVE COVID-19. 

This might seem tedious but they have to make sure you are not going to infect their staff. 

6. DENTIST ARE EXTREMELY LIMITED IN THE TREATMENTS THEY CAN OFFER. THEY USUALLY CANNOT DO FILLINGS OR ANYTHING THAT INVOLVES DRILLING OR THE SPRAYING OF WATER INTO YOUR MOUTH.

Be warmed some dentists as can only do extractions. The first dentist I spoke to at my practice told me that was all he could do because of the limited PPE (personal protection equipment) he had. 

Luckily, I was able to get an appointment with my own dentist who had better PPE. 

7. FROM THE MOMENT YOU ENTER THE SURGERY UNTIL THE MOMENT YOU LEAVE, YOU SHOULD TRY AND NOT TOUCH ANYTHING AND WEAR YOUR MASK AT ALL TIMES except when the dentist says to remove it for the treatment. 

Going to the dentist was scary but they were very nice. As long as you follow instructions you should be fine. 

I was told that if my tooth was infected I would have been given root canal treatment over 2 visits. 

Thankully in my case, my tooth was just chipped and there was no tooth decay. The dentist told me that the temporary filling I put in was fine and to leave it until the day he could do a filling. If it had not been for the virus I would have hugged him! Yes, I was that relieved. 

How not to die like in the horror movies

Like a  lot of writers I love horror movies and tv shows and it's time well spent because I now have tips on how to avoid being killed by a knife-wielding maniac.

CLOSE THOSE SHOWER CURTAINS, FOLKS.

1.In bathrooms, shower curtains should always be left open never closed. I've seen far too many scenes where the killer/Jason/Psycho character is hiding behind it.

MAKE YOUR KEYS FUMBLE PROOF 

2.Don't drop your keys at your front door. No, put them in a key ring and keep it attached to your bag/purse. Less chance of some hooded killer coming up behind you with a knife and grabbing you after you've bent down and slitting your throat.

SAVE A DOG'S LIFE AND THEY'LL SAVE YOURS

3.Adopt a dog. A dog barking will make any potential creepy attacker think twice. Preferably adopt a decent-sized pup like my gorgeous goofball Harley and not one the size of a cat as a knife-wielding maniac is unlikely to be put off by a yapping dog they can tell is too small to bite them on the backside. He or she will save your life.

HAVE A FULLY CHARGED PHONE

4.Dont go anywhere you can't get a mobile phone signal and always make sure you have it charged and or have an emergency charger with you. I've lost count of the number of times a target - usually, a blonde woman in skimpy white t-shirt and shorts has been unable to call for help because of a duff phone. Don't let it be you.


Last of all and probably most importantly,  

5. try and keep fit so you have at least some chance of running away from a madman or woman. Run out of puff and you're dead.

5. try and keep fit so you have at least some chance of runng away from a madman or woman. Run out of puff and you're dead.

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It's been fun... farewell to the Cannibal City book tour

This is the final day of the Cannibal City blog tour and it's been amazing. I'm so sad it has to end.

Thanks to everyone who has taken part. You've been amazing and I appreciate the time you spent reading and writing about Cannibal City.

In truth, I haven't been feeling too well recently mentally and at times I've struggled to get any writing done because of a complete loss of confidence. 

Having this blog tour has given me a boost, so thanks to everyone for getting involved. 

A special thanks to damppebbles.com for doing all the organising.

I'd like to thank today's two stops on the tour for having #CannibalCity and me on on their fantastic blogs.

Here's what @cheekypee27 had to say about Cannibal City -

This is book two in the series and I highly recommend you read book one Vile City first.

There is a serial killer on the loose and DI Waddell is on the case. This series is different in that Waddell gets help from his colleague Stevie- who’s in a coma.

I really liked this storyline. The twists and turns had me glued to my kindle. Can’t wait to read more from this author.

Meanwhile, @colingarrow was kind enough to feature me in his Author spotlight. 

The double tragedy of Mary Duncan, 17, missing since 1976

Police Scotland photo

Of all the cases I have ever read about that are unsolved this is one of the ones that has haunted me. A teenage girl with her whole life ahead of love and a baby daughter she adored at home, Mary Duncan would have lived a full life by now. 

But instead, it seems likely that she was murdered at the young age of 17 in 1976 although her body is still to be found and nobody has been arrested for her murder. 

The young mum who became pregnant at 15 would not have gone quietly. She would have fought to stay with her child. 

I recently read on the news that police were searching the grounds of Vale of Leven hospital in Dunbartonshire in Scotland for the remains of the missing young mum.

The double tragedy of the disappearance of young Mary 44 years ago, is that soon after she went missing, Laura, the young daughter she loved to bits died of natural causes. The bairn hadn't yet reached her second birthday. 

When Mary was last seen she told her family she was going to meet a friend. Of course, being a teenager it has been suggested that Mary upped sticks and left, but this doesn't appear to be in character. 

According to Chief Superindent Calum Young: "Extensive inquiries continue in an attempt to find any indication of where Mary could be. However, due to the fact that she has not been seen or heard from in 44 years, we must consider the option that she may have come to harm."

Looking at pictures of Mary, you see a bright and happy young woman and a loving mum who would never have left her baby. It would have taken something awful to pull her away from her child. 

Hopefully, the police search will finally get some answers so that Mary and her beautiful baby will finally be able to rest in peace together. 

Footnote - Mary and her three sisters'stepfather, Norman Duncan, was jailed for 5 years for historical sexual offences against girls and was spoken to as one of a number of lines of inquiry.

How to stop your Nokia 2.3 phone turning its screen on when not in use

How I avoided doing a Ron Swanson

Needing to update my technology, I recently bought myself a new phone. A Nokia 2.3.

I love that phone apart from one thing. One extremely annoying thing - every single time I put the phone in my pocket and click on the power button switch, which on all the phones I've had has locked the screen and stopped it from working when in my pocket, the phone screen with come back on again.

I would find garbled, nonsensical notes that had been written. It would open my email app. Even worse, it would start to dial up numbers.

At my wits end and ready to do a Ron Swanson and smash the phone to bits or toss it out the window, I did some internet research to try and see how I could solve this problem. 

Most of what I read talked about functions my phone disn't have. The one that it did have was about the ability to turn off the ambient feature. This was accessed through the settings menu and then by going on to display.

Unfortunately this doesn't work. 

Then I was looking through the functions on my phone and I came across the ~ Lift To Check My Phone Function. This was devised to check your notifications, time and and other information by simply lifting up the phone.

I found this on my phone in the SETTINGS - SYSTEM - GESTURES and deselected PICK UP MY PHONE and now when I click on the power button quickly with one press it stops my screen lighting up when it's in my pocket or sitting down on a table.

Problem solved👍 No more risk of butt dialling or of throwing my phone off a bridge. 

The coolest introduction to a book ever for How Kirsty gets her kicks

#BookTalk @ShotgunHoney @Gabino_Iglesias @beaujohnson44 @RonEarl @JenniferHillier @nikkidolson @tracy_reads79 @cinapelayo @JLFoster_ @ToriEldridge @sarahmchen @JTravisGrundon @JamesDFHannah @Curtis9980 @WellReadBeard @SteveGone58 @ItsMarkYall @Jimthomsen @ElizabethHeiter pic.twitter.com/Whv0ld4xUa

— Mark Pelletier (@MPell2137) July 16, 2020

This is the coolest introduction to a book ever. 

Thanks to the awesome Mark Pelletier @MPell2137 and to Shotgun Honey for publishing How Kirsty Gets Her Kicks https://twitter.com/MPell2137/status/1283790631538589696?s=19

What's the book about then?

A tale of skullduggery that plays out on the mean streets of Glasgow…

One-legged barmaid Kirsty is in a shit-load of trouble after she kills one of gangster Jimmy McPhee’s enforcers with a stiletto heel to the head after he gets a bit too handsie.

Now she’s on the run from the gang boss who loves to torture his victims before he kills them, with a safe-load of cash she stole from him and a hot gun. And she has company—a choirboy barman Jamie who just happens to be the only witness.

She needs to survive long enough to spend the cash.

How difficult can it be to catch a “daft wee lassie with one leg?” Glasgow hardman Jimmy McPhee is about to find out. Kirsty’s made a laughing stock out of him and he doesn’t like that one wee bit.

Bring together a one-legged barmaid who’s legged it with a safe load of dirty cash, a spurned gangster’s wife who wants a walking womb for her mail order sperm, a giant birthday cake and a mad chase to the end, and you’ve got How Kirsty Gets Her Kicks: one freaking minute at a time.

3 ways to get more writing done during lockdown

one writer's office

"I can't seem to find the time to get any writing done with everything that's going on."

That's a common refrain I'm hearing from writing pals. It's understandable given the circumstances caused by the coronavirus.

But there are ways you can get some writing done.

Here are just four -

writing is work

1. Don't tell your family that you're going to "get some writing done". 

Nope, tell them you have some work to do.

A funny thing happens to writers I know. When they tell their families they're off to do some writing they get constantly interrupted by kids asking where stuff is and partners coming in for a natter. 

Unless you say you're working, your work will be treated like it's not work at all.

Not everything good comes in large packages

2.  Try to do your writing in manageable chunks. If you have 10 minutes to spare use that time. You might find it easier than say telling yourself you need to set a few hours aside to work on that article or your novel.

Speech to text can get that writing done

3. A slow typer or just someone who likes to read something out loud that you've written to see how it scans, making use of the speech to text capabilities on your phone, tablet or laptop is a good way to get your writing done. It's also perfect when you just want a break from typing and want to be productive.

I use OneNote on my phone.