Things I wish they’d told me about being a writer

1-You will see the world in a way that others will find extremely disturbing. To others an ice pick is for breaking up ice, to me, it's a potential weapon for my main character in Hell to Pay to use on the most vulnerable part of her attacker's anatomy.

 

Sadly, I don't earn as much as this guy. I wish.

 

2-Non-writers think you earn way much more than you do. That you're in Stephen King's league and if you're not they think your writing can't be that good. Well, it's easy to make money writing. No, sadly it's not.

3-When you try and build a platform for yourself to promote your work, you may attract unwanted attention. See Sinister side of Facebook post.

4-You'll have a deathly pale pallor from all those hours sitting in the near dark, crouched over a laptop/scribbling away. People will keep saying, 'Are you ill?'

5-You'll develop a belly from all that sitting down writing. There's no time for exercise unless it involves walking the dog. Well, he listens to you outlining possible plots (with his ears plugging up his lug holed).

6-People will think you're being rude when you don't acknowledge them, when you're really preoccupied with working out how your character can get away with killing someone.

 

I'm not planning a real murder, honest.

Research for a novel can be varied. So far this month, I have looked into the following:

·         how easy it would be for a woman to jump out of cake (these cakes are called pop out cakes)

·         where a woman would keep a gun as she jumped out the cake

·         whether a garlic press can be used on a certain part of the male anatomy

·         how to dispose of a body in a way it can never be found

It’s no wonder that I permanently carry my Society of Authors card around with me.

Well, if you caught someone doing that kind of research would you not think they were up to no good?

Only writing, honest officer.

Readers Digest £5,000 for 100 words

I have just entered two stories in the Reader’s Digest flash fiction comp.  The big prize is £5,000.  Imagine what you could do with that? 

Stories must not be more than 100 words and that excludes the title, so no need to add that into your word count.

Go to - http://www.readersdigest.co.uk/magazine/179-Reader%27s-Digest-Main/1382-Web-Exclusives-100-word-story.html?res=success

If you fancy a go.

Waiting…

A publisher has expressed an interest in one of my novels.  After the initial Yippee and dance around the room, I am now left waiting by my laptop and the phone, hoping they will get in touch.    

They say no news is good news, but sometimes I wonder.  Being a writer is to be full of doubts, to knock yourself down and continually ask, ‘am I good enough?’ 

I would love this publisher to take on my book because I believe they are bringing out the kind of books that people will enjoy reading. 

Hopefully the next time I mention them it will be to say they've given me a most emphatic yes.  But, if they don't.  I won't give up.  I will still keep on writing on toilet paper when I go to the loo.  I will write on bus and train tickets, on menus and napkins.